Hi,

I have a bit of a problem. I'm in my first professinal play and it's getting a lot of publisity. I just am feeling bad because the lead role boy in the show is getting his name every where and I haven't been mentioned once. I know i'm being petty and I'm happy for him but this boy is the same age as me but he got the bigger part. I just want anyone to give me advise one how they deal on this.

Just keep in mind that the lead role boy probably didn't start out in lead roles.  He probably had smaller roles.  Just concentrate on doing the best you can with your role.  The playwright put it there for a reason.  As much as all that publicity is nice, it can be distracting.  Keep your eye on the end goal and have fun, be professional in your attitude and remember that everybody had to start somewhere.

You say it's professional theatre.   Then have a professional attitude.  You say he has the bigger part so does it not make sense that the publicity might revolve around him.

Yes, you are being petty.   You're getting paid for what some people only dream they could spend their life doing professionally. 

SUCK IT UP and act professionally!!     Do you really think that anyone that sees the show cares about the publicity this or that actor got.   Perform well and don't have an attitude and your work will be recognized by the right people who will be able to do more for you than the publicity of a single show.

I challenge you to bring your "problem" to the producers of the show.  You and I both know that they'll tell you to pound sand.

Sorry if you didn't get much sympathy here.  Break a leg!

Wow B-M-D That was harsh!

I don't think I have an attitude about it, and yes he DOES deserve all the publisity but I have hadmultipule people at school say to me "why weren't you in the paper?" so I was just feeling "down"   and I defenitly WON'T say anything to anyone in the cast or production team. It's just hard for me. I never ment this topic to be a place where people tell me I shouldn't complain, I just wanted to hear what other people would "think" in my situation. 

So I'm sorry if I'm being petty!!!

EVE and PLaywright-- Thanks for the great advise! I'm already feeling better

Yup it was harsh and that was the intent.   And you should be sorry for being petty. 

Waah, waah....your feelings were hurt because your name didn't appear in the paper.   Would you be feeling this way if you were getting the publicity and the other guy wasn't?  

Why not try some shameless self promotion and email, IM, text message, phone or send smoke signals to all of your friends, relatives, aquaintances....agents even...and say hey come see me in this fabulous show.

You may not understand yet that life isn't fair, the theatre certainly isn't, and never will be.  Get used to it.   (and if you're thinking that it should be that's an entirely different discussion /argument having nothing to do with reality).

Now learn your lines, be on time and don't bump into the furniture!!

Have you the heard the one about Oprah Winfrey?  

When she was cast in the movie "Color Purple", she was not big enough  to have her name on the movie poster.  Poor thing just had that little talk show in Chicago.

All good things in time.

I think we have all experienced what you are feeling - in one way or another - and you have already been given some great advise.  I applaude B-M-D for being so honest! I really don't have much new to offer. I might just say, that being a male actor with any talent at all, you will have a much easier job of getting that lead part someday, and the publicity that goes with it.  It is not as easy for female actors, for there always seems to be about a 4 to 1 (women to men) ratio at auditions. Many times I have seen a "so-so" male actor get the lead, and have 3 to 4 excellent women to choose from for the female lead. Good luck and hard work will get you there.

We've all carried spears.  Try to remember that the publicity (which is the issue for the producers) has nothing to do with the artistic values of the play (which is your issue).

Did you ever see Shakespeare in Love?  If not, go rent it right now.  I'll wait.

Hm, hm, la la la la . . .

Oh, you're back?  Good. 

Anyway, remember the bit at the party after Romeo and Juliet opens?  Some people who haven't seen it are asking the guy who plays the nurse what it's about, and he answers, "It's about this nurse . . . "

That's what your attitude should be, not for publicity purposes (after all, did any of the reviews of The Godfather mention Third Mobster From the Left?), and definitely not for display in front of your fellow actors, but for your preparation of the role.  TO YOU, your role is the most important. 

Playwright, who posted above, is a, well, playwright, so she knows whereof she speaks.  It is absolutely true that every role is in the play for a reason.  Find that reason, and play the hell out of it.  And next time, or the time after, you'll be Lead Role Boy  and somebody will be complaining about all the publicity you're getting!

PS to Gaafa:  Oh, how I wish you had said "a stage manager with one leg named Ralph" so I could ask "what was the name of his other leg."  But you didn't. 

So what, exactly, have you seen me in? 

It's great that some of the people on this board have the courage to speak honestly and say things that need to be said. It would also be great if they had the courage to say those honest things in a softer and constructive manner so that the recipient doesn't go away feeling awful about him/herself.  I think we're all on this board to give advice when asked and to learn when we need to.  There are ways of giving advice that let the recipient go away feeling good about themselves while still having learned a lesson.

Yes, yes at times I say the things that need to be said in unvarnished tones that make it crystal clear as to what I mean.   I am direct, frank and to the point.  Not unlike how I am in real life.   And believe it or not I still have friends.....who are actors.....and who want to work with me time and again.

A straight talking, no non-sense guy that has friends in theatre.....go figure!!

I think I found our translator:

I knew I was taking a chance when I expressed my opinion about ways to offer constructive criticism, but I felt it had to be said.

I have adjudicated/responded in community theatre festivals for nigh on to 30 years, and I have had quite a bit of training in the same.  One thing that is always emphasized is:  yes, honesty, but expressed in a way that allows the participating groups/individuals to go away with some sense of dignity and self-worth.  Making criticisms in this way does nothing to diminish the honesty of the critiques, it just allows them to learn in a constructive, not destructive, way.  Expressing raw, unkind criticism (though honest and perhaps deserved) serves only to put individuals/presenting groups on the defensive which in turn shuts down their ability/willingness to listen and learn.  They are quite likely to dismiss the criticism as mere rantings (I know this is the case from experiences that presenting groups have shared with me).  There are ways to be crystal clear, frank, direct, and to the point in a constructive way and still make your point understood. And to help the recipients of the criticism learn the lessons that they need to.

It's not about how far you can go and still remain friends with the recipients of the criticisms;  it's about the dignity and self-esteem of those on the receiving end.  Yes, some people are thicker skinned than others, but you also need to take into consideration those that are thinner skinned.  There is a big difference between saying "Waah, waah, waah....don't be a baby" and something like "After you achieve more maturity in yourself and your craft you will come to realize that ...." etc.

I realize that we aren't ever going to agree on this.  Just wanted to express my opinion and let you know that there are people out there that don't or can't accept or respond well to that type of criticism.

I'm done venting now!

Unfortunately I lack the skill (or patience) to walk that fine line.   I appreciate that some people do.  

I love that good theatre adjudicators are able to parse critisism, suggestion and learning.   Having participated in a few drama festivals here I was recently witness this past June to the best and worst of both worlds.   In this particular festival we import "professionals" as opposed to the folks that do our regular production consultations and awards. One (a well known soap actor) was the worst offender, offering only critisism and not much else.  Though spot on with his observations (validating most of my thoughts) they were not couched in a manner that suited the forum.  Another (a director and playwright) was useless in that he went out of his way so as not to offend anyone that we gleaned very little from his feedback.   The third and best was a woman who was a professional director and educator (perhaps there in lies the difference) asked probing questions and let us know where we made good choices and other choices that may have been better and why. If a production stunk you stlill understood that it stunk but you knew why and how to improve it.   Fortunately for the show I directed all three liked it and we were nominated in several categories including best ensemble and my SM won for best Stage Manger (the nominees and winner for SM are determined by the stage managers of the festival itself and not the adjudicators).

Hope you stick with this disscussion board red diva.  Although I'm not in total agreement with you on everything I appreciate the intelligent insight that you bring to it.

I'm honored to be included in such good company!   .....and trying to translate Gaafa is almost half the fun of this forum. 

Thanks for the kind words, BMD.  I appreciate them!

It's great to have this venue to compare, vent, offer, suggest, share, criticize, and learn.  I certainly will stay with it, and I look forward to more honest and informative discussions! (My skin has thickened over the years....I really am a tough old broad.)

For Goldcanyonlady, yes this is a professional play. I am getting paid and pay taxes for it. ( i hate taxes)..

    Thanks Everyone, I appreciate everyones advise. Alltho I would appreciated a LITTLE sypmithy. For example "grow up" I'm sorry  I didn't mean to be so childish. But understand what everyone is saying and I feel much better.