I am the technical director for two high school home school co-op productions. I am also the middle school drama teacher. Because of the small size of our production team for the high school class, the 3 teachers (me included) wear many hats.

The director, producer and I made up the casting team. We held auditions for both productions and cast them simultaneously. It was a bear to figure out how to manage the children, look at all the talent and cast kids in their appropriate roles. But, I thought we did a nice job and ended up with two nice casts. We will be performing Little Women and Pride and Prejudice.

In the 5 days since we published the cast list, we have suffered terrible backlash. We mainly heard from two moms and heard a little grumbling through the grapevine. One mom, in particular, has been ruthless with her backlash. She also happens to be the owner of the co-op, so we have no way to recast her two daughters because of her poor behavior.

One issue with this production and our production last year is that this mom has a natural tendency to direct the director. She was on the production team last year. So, the director had to fight like tooth and nail to get her way. This mom is not on the production team this year but is trying to direct by letting us know what an awful job we did with casting.

My thing is that I think the co-op (students as well as parents) could stand to use a lesson on theatre etiquette. I found one gem of an article that spoke about theatre etiquette and how theatre is no democracy. The director has the last say. I would like to find more information on this topic. Can anyone point me to the direction of an article that explains theatre etiquette, in particular as it relates to respecting and listening to the director. I think this may really help with defining the lines that should not be crossed.

Thank you,
Kim

I strongly suggest you and your other team members do a "community production" next year. Is it possible for you to use the middle school or local church as a venue? So you don't lose money there offer them a percentage of the box office as rent instead of out right off the top payment. A parent like you are describing will literally hold you hostage both in your authority and creativly. 

A home school co-op is a cooperative teaching group for children who are home schooled. Moms come together and pool their resources to provide children with classes they cannot get at home. The drama at our co-op has grown. This year, we are putting on two straight plays with casts of 25 high schoolers in each.

The reason the mom is so upset is that older daughter was cast in a role that younger daughter wanted. Younger daughter was cast in a small part b/c of age and skills. Mom thought the directors should have been sensitive to casting one child in a role the other wanted. It is really silly. Younger daughter is sulking and older daughter is made to feel "evil" (her word, not mine) for being cast in the role. It is very convoluted.

The reason I would consider recasting is to send mom a message. We really just need firm rules on arguing with the directors' casting call. That is why I wanted to find resources on "theatre etiquette." I thought we could use the opportunity to teach the students and parents how real theatre is done. Maybe I am fooling myself that this mom would listen.

My kids have done community before and have loved it. It is easier for me to get the drama within our group as sort of a one-stop-shop with other subjects.

Any leads on theatre etiquette? Books? Articles?

Originally posted by Kim L. The reason the mom is so upset is that older daughter was cast in a role that younger daughter wanted. Younger daughter was cast in a small part b/c of age and skills. Mom thought the directors should have been sensitive to casting one child in a role the other wanted. It is really silly. Younger daughter is sulking and older daughter is made to feel "evil" (her word, not mine) for being cast in the role. It is very convoluted.

Originally posted by biggertigger Originally posted by Kim L. The reason the mom is so upset is that older daughter was cast in a role that younger daughter wanted. Younger daughter was cast in a small part b/c of age and skills. Mom thought the directors should have been sensitive to casting one child in a role the other wanted. It is really silly. Younger daughter is sulking and older daughter is made to feel "evil" (her word, not mine) for being cast in the role. It is very convoluted. Sorry to be blunt, but tell the family to get over themselves. The world does not and will not revolve around them. The younger daughter and mother need to realize that there are plenty of times in life you will not get what you want. The older daughter shouldn't feel guilty. Yes, its disappointing not to get what you want and that when someone else wanted what you got you can't be made to feel completely bad about it. What are you teaching kids here, that if you cry and go to mommy then you'll get what you want. It doesn't work this way in life and kids should be made to understand this. Now, that being said. I am not coming down and trashing this co-op, what you are doing is wonderful. I would suggest that you remember what these lessons are about, teaching children. This is one lesson that should be taught, how to handle disappointment and how to put personal feelings aside and work for the greater cause. Now go up to this mother, slap her hand and say "bad mommy".

Well said!

You as director, are not required to actively participate in this womans ruining of her children. The fact that they are girls makes it worse for me, I'm so frustrated by this new Paris Hilton worshipping, sweet sixteen loving, I get what I want because I am the only person who really matters culture that has sprung up around young girls these days.