Ladies and Gentleman, Welcome to The Community Theater of Performing Arts.  In case of emergency please note the location of the nearest fire exit keeping in mind they maybe in front or behind you.  For safety of everyone please keep all ailse clear.  As a courtesy of those around you, please refrain from eating, drinking, and there is no smoking at this facility.  (Smoking areas are located in...)  The use of pictures and recording devices are strickly prohibited.  So, sit back, relax, and enjoy tonight's (today's) performance.